Things I miss.

• The smell of my babies when they were newborn.  My husband thought they smelled like french fries.  Mmm.
• My pert and perfect size 34B boobs.  They now resemble the soft serve remnants left behind at the bottom of the self-serve machine.
• Emailing Marci and using obscure 80’s song lyric quotes that only he would get.  Now that he works at a winery, he’s a fucking snob.  (I typed that with my pinky held up in the air.)
• Working with people I actually liked.  Skatz the lact-ard, Gaylord the girl who can only poop at home, and Churl the gal who says ‘I like soup!’ but isn’t retarded.  Really.
• Starsky and Hutch.  The original series.  “David Soul is the most underated actor of our generation, ” my husband once declared.  Sober.
• My Grandma who died when I was eight.  The older I get, the more I miss the fact that she wasn’t around.  I can tell in retrospect she was a cool broad.
• My 80’s clothes.  Anything looks good when you’re a size two.