i saw red… thoughts from a (fake) red head

July 29, 2008

Things I miss.

Filed under: ha!,love,random — kp @ 10:38 am

  • The smell of my babies when they were newborn.  My husband thought they smelled like french fries.  Mmm.
  • My pert and perfect size 34B boobs.  They now resemble the soft serve remnants left behind at the bottom of the self-serve machine.
  • Emailing Marci and using obscure 80’s song lyric quotes that only he would get.  Now that he works at a winery, he’s a fucking snob.  (I typed that with my pinky held up in the air.)
  • Working with people I actually liked.  Skatz the lact-ard, Gaylord the girl who can only poop at home, and Churl the gal who says ‘I like soup!’ but isn’t retarded.  Really.
  • Starsky and Hutch.  The original series.  “David Soul is the most underated actor of our generation, ” my husband once declared.  Sober.
  • My Grandma who died when I was eight.  The older I get, the more I miss the fact that she wasn’t around.  I can tell in retrospect she was a cool broad.
  • My 80’s clothes.  Anything looks good when you’re a size two.


  1. Yeah, I miss being a size two, er, actually, I was a zero. Those were the days, and never again. 😦


    Comment by K. Jayne Cockrill — July 29, 2008 @ 11:15 am

  2. Mmmmm…I do like soup! I miss you too kp. Let’s all retire and eat fro-yo all day. We’ll even let you watch Murder She Wrote re-runs all day 🙂

    Comment by Churl — July 30, 2008 @ 12:35 am

  3. Just because your boobs aren’t a size 2, doesn’t mean your ass isn’t. Cause I saw it, and it is. I hate you. But I miss you.

    Comment by Gaylord — July 30, 2008 @ 12:39 am

  4. Slow change will tear us apart, KP.

    You know, I’d comment on the snob thing, but I’m finishing this glass of Petit Verdot, which I find unpretentious and eminently approachable. Besides, you are just jealous that I get to drink at my desk at 10 a.m. (like I didn’t anyway).

    PS: I just wanted to point out that I took the moral high ground and didn’t make a boob joke, which is not like me.


    Comment by Marci — July 30, 2008 @ 1:53 pm

  5. attention everyone: Marci has moobs.

    Comment by kp — July 30, 2008 @ 10:24 pm

  6. It’s true…however they are a petite size 2 (21.5 European).

    Comment by Marci — July 31, 2008 @ 1:20 pm

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